| The Basics |
Understanding Women |
| |
Let’s start with a few assumptions. Yeah, yeah. We know that assuming makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me”. But let’s put that aside for a minute, ok?
Let’s get back to the assumptions.
We assume you like sex.
We assume you like women.
(If either of these assumptions is wrong, go away. This is not the website for you.)
We assume you’d like more sex.
We assume you’d like it to be with more women.
Are we still in agreement here? Good because you have come to the right place. This website is made just for you—the guy who wants more women and more sex. It includes all the best tips, ideas, advice and guidance we could find—all in one spot. No more reading through the fluff, the meandering, the non-essential information of other books. This is THE website you will want to read, re-read and hell yes, memorize so that you can have exactly what it is you have been wanting (refer back to women and sex).
As guys, we know just what you’re talking about, thinking about, fantasizing about and wishing, hoping, praying for. We’ve been there. We’ve done that. In fact, we still do it ... except that our wishes, hopes and prayers have turned into research, analysis, experimentation and yes, at last, success. (For those of you who didn’t quite follow that, it means we get laid more often.) We have found what works, we have studied the masters, we have done the hard work for you—and here it is in the one reference guide you will ever need.
We have learned amazing things from amazing experts. We found out that you don’t have to be incredibly rich to get laid. You don’t have to have six-pack abs or be a powerful CEO of a large company. You don’t even have to work in the movie or modeling business. (Of course, none of these things are apt to hurt, but they aren’t required.) All you really need is to know some key things and then you can get into the game. Those key things are RIGHT HERE.
Just to clarify—you knew it was a game, right? This romance / dating / seduction / lust process — whatever euphemism you put on it—is a game. You have the main role in it and all those horny, single women out there just waiting to meet you are the other players. How do you win the game? You find this website. Then, you read it front to back—more than once. Then you take your new skills and knowledge out into the world to meet those female players, charm and seduce them and then get them into your bed in a smooth and sophisticated process. You may not get a crown or a trophy—but isn’t sex its own reward? Most guys we know would trade a romp in the sack with some beautiful, bodacious babe over some stupid prize any day.
Like any other game, of course, there are some rules to follow. The reason your past dating life has sucked is because you don’t know the rules. You don’t know the tricks. You don’t know what will turn those chilly no’s into warm yes’s. That’s what this website is for. We want to lead you into the land of women and show you how to do what players are meant to do—score!
There is not enough room in this website to fully teach you to understand women. There isn’t time enough to read the website that could teach you that ... actually there isn’t even enough paper on the planet to teach men how to understand women. So, stop trying to understand them and move right past it to accepting and (shhh) manipulating them. By learning about how they think and act (again, forget understanding because they truly are hardwired completely differently than we are), you can begin to affect how they think and act.
One of the best ways to learn more about women is talk to them wherever you go. Talk to the lady in front of you at the grocery store. Talk to the waitress at your favorite restaurant. Talk to women in grocery stores, bookstores, the gym, wherever you see them and have the opportunity. Every interaction will show you something and make you more comfortable talking with the opposite sex. Believe it or not, the experts in the field believe that you should interact with (are you sitting down?) a minimum of 50 females a day. That may seem impossible but give it a try. You may well be amazed at how many women you get to know just by doing this and who knows, it may even end up in a hot date. Scoring is a volume game, and the more women you talk to, the more you will get laid… that’s a fact!!!
The first part of understanding women is admitting something very important to yourself. It is something that society doesn’t want you to admit. It is something that women don’t like to hear. Nonetheless, it is an important truth that has to be said, so repeat after us: “It is okay to be a man. It is okay to want sex as often as possible with as many women as possible. This is not something I need to be ashamed of. I don’t need to apologize for it. It is just who I am and how I and my entire gender were designed.” And actually, the kind of women you want, want a man like that.
Now that that is out of the way, you can begin following it up by finding and succeeding with the women that allow you to feel like a real man.
Women are human beings. They are worthwhile and valuable human beings that are certainly equal to men. They are not, however, NOT the SAME as men. You already know that their bodies are put together completely differently (yes!). Their minds are also very, very different than ours and that difference can cause misunderstandings between you, not to mention endless rejections.
A woman has different needs and desires than you. While she certainly enjoys great sex, it is often not the reason or motivation behind why she is looking hot sitting in a bar. Sure, she is there to meet handsome guys but she cares less about who you are than how she feels when she is with you. She wants to feel cherished, loved and appreciated. She wants to feel desirable and beautiful. Sometimes the way you do this will seem contradictory—as in “negging” a woman. That technique is used in special situations and if you do it right, you can end up intriguing her so much she will want to know more. If you play the game right, she will want to be with you because of the feelings and the mystery you create within her.
A single woman is usually looking for way more than sex (see, how different she is?). She is looking for emotional connection. If she gets that, then she will feel much more willing to open up to the idea of sexual pleasure. (Yeah, yeah. It’s the opposite for you. For us too. What can we say?) A wise saying advises, to get what you want (i.e. sex) give her what she wants (connection). Listen up grasshopper, it’s good advice.
When you approach a good looking woman, you envision wild, uninhibited sex, a night of passion and a great story to share with the guys. When a woman is approached, she envisions a guy breaking her heart, using and discarding her, treating her as a disposable toy. You are a threat to her—she is a temptation to you. She is scared to invest her time, effort and emotions in you. Think what it would be like if you were in her place. (Ok, after you spent the first few minutes feeling up your new boobs...) It can be scary for a women and her fear often comes across as coldness or snobbiness when that has nothing to do with it at all. So, don’t take it personally when a woman rejects you – often it’s not your fault.
It is harder for a woman to say yes to sex because there are more consequences for her. The more women you sleep with, the hotter you are. Men envy you. You are THE man. The more men a woman sleeps with, on the other hand, the more she is labeled a slut. Women scorn her. Her family is embarrassed by her. Saying yes to you means risking getting a reputation that can hurt her. A woman’s self-esteem is already a shaky thing. If she sees herself as easy and promiscuous, that esteem is going to fall—and you may be the one to pay the price because it turns into a rejection.
The coming chapters will show you how to approach women in many different ways. Before we start, however, let’s look at the elements of the inner game and the outer game. These are factors that you can influence and change—some in minutes, others in months—to make winning the game (remember that translates into getting laid) a lot more likely.
The game begins the moment you walk into a bar, nightclub, restaurant or any other public place and approach a woman. Here the bell ringing? Let the mating dance begin.
|
| Top |
| |
| Inner Game |
The Inner Game refers to those things that you have to generate from inside. This includes:
Your attitude
Your confidence
Your self-esteem
Your self-talk
Your personality
Let’s walk through each one of these to make sure you have a good idea of what each one entails. You can’t do it if you don’t understand it, right?
Nothing you do—not the classes you take, the books you read (well, except for this one, of course!), the people you talk to, or the videos you watch—will mean more to your overall success than what is going on between your ears. Your state of mind is THE key to whether or not you succeed with women. Before you involve your dick, engage your brain. Use the head with the brains first.
Let’s start with your attitude about yourself. When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Skip the statistics—we don’t mean your height, hair color, how straight your teeth are or how long anything is—or isn’t. You absolutely have to have complete confidence in yourself if you plan to charm women. If you just think you are average, okay, normal or typical—then you need an attitude adjustment. Just thinking you’re a decent guy won’t get women into bed. It may get them to chat with you for a minute but you won’t get numbers and you definitely will not get any sex.
How do you change your self-esteem? Here are some ideas to try right away. In other words, don’t read any more until you have done them chump!
(1) Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses.
Most people can come up with weaknesses pretty fast so let’s concentrate on the strengths first. What makes you unique? What are you skilled at? What have others complimented you on? What has won you awards or other recognition? What makes you you? Write all of those down. Now list some of your weaknesses, but next to each one, list at least two steps you can take to change them. What can you do, learn, read, etc. to turn that weakness into strength?
(2) Create your own motto and repeat it at least five times a day.
We know that the old adage of “You are what you eat” is a familiar one but a more honest one is “you are what you think”. If you think you are dumb, ugly, boring and so on, chances are that you are. Filling your mind with negative thinking is one of the best ways to strike out with women there is. If you walk up to a great looking girl and inside you are thinking, “Man, she would have to be an idiot to go down on a loser like me”, don’t be surprised if she walks away before you can even say anything. Why shouldn’t she? If you think you’re a loser, she has no reason to think otherwise. Your whole body and expression will reflect your low self-esteem. But what if you walked up to her thinking, “I am the best thing that has ever happened to this woman?” I hope she is smart enough to realize all I have to offer her.” How would your posture and bearing change? How would your facial expression change? But it is not just how you appear on the outside. Women can “perceive” a man’s lack of confidence as well. Yeah, that’s right somehow they just know. So do yourself a favor and get rid of that negative thinking.
There is a great saying that goes, “To become, act as if”. In other words, if you want to be like something—wealthy, thin, funny, charming, intelligent, and so on—then act like you already are. If you behave like one, you will be much closer to actually being one. If you want to be a smooth and desirable man, act like you already are. Remember that whatever your belief, you will find evidence all around you to support it. If you believe you’re undateable, you will find the facts to back it up. If you believe you’re unstoppable, you fill find that information too.
Come up with your very own motto to repeat and replay in your mind several times a day. It can be anything that is important to you, as long as it is phrased positively. Say, “I am a prize and women will be enriched by my presence”; “I am strong, handsome and sexy so all women on some level want me” or “I am full of power and sexual electricity. I can make any woman cum better than anyone else in the world.” Repeat this throughout the day and especially when approaching a woman and starting to play the game.
Create your own motto. Write it down in your day planner. Put in on post-it notes ® on your bathroom mirror, in your wallet—wherever you will look often and regularly.
(3) Make your feelings of low self-esteem so awful you never want to feel them again.
One trick that some people use when they are trying to improve their self-esteem is to wallow very deeply in those negative feelings for a few intense moments until they feel like they will explode from the hideousness of how it makes them feel. When those negative emotions are associated with low self-esteem, it is normal to avoid feeling it again. When you start down that pathway it will feel so terrible that you immediately start thinking positively to make it all go away.
How is your personality? Are you an interesting person? If not, why not? What are you doing with your life? If the answer is watch the game and sit on the couch with a beer and chips, do we need to point out why you’re still single and most likely not getting laid? Women like men who have interests and hobbies. They want to know you have a real life—a life that you actually enjoy, so be ready to carry on a conversation about yourself. Have a working knowledge of the current events in the news. Know about the latest movies and books. Develop an intriguing skill that you can talk about without boring her.
Women Like Men who are:
Funny
Intelligent
Creative
Educated
Cultured
Classy
Dominant
Thoughtful
Unpredictable
Happy
Enthusiastic
Adventurous
Confident
Romantic
Pay attention to detail
Charming
Passionate
Driven
Social
How many of these describe you?
Don’t, however make one of the most common male mistakes ever made and focus the entire conversation on yourself. Remember—a woman becomes most interested in you because of how you make her feel. You want to make her feel like she is exciting and interesting too, so ask about her life. Show a whole range of emotions as you listen to her, including curiosity, fascination, humor and sincerity. Women absolutely love emotions and if you use them in response to her, she will connect to them—and you.
|
| Top |
| |
Outer Game |
The Outer Games refers to those things that are apparent on the outside. This includes:
Your looks
Your health
Your voice
Your body language
Your home
Your facial expressions
Your posture
Your clothing and accessories
Even though women are attracted by many other factors than mere appearance, it is still an important issue, so let’s cover the basics here and now. None of this should be new news. If it is, no wonder you haven’t been scoring lately.
How would you walk, move and dress if you knew you were one of the world’s most amazing lovers? Most likely, you’d stand taller, with head up (not that one!) and shoulders back. If you can’t get your posture to do this easily, see a chiropractor. Take an exercise class to stretch those tight muscles. You’d speak a little louder and more slowly in a deeper pitch. You’d breathe slower and smile bigger. You’d make eye contact with any women and approach them with a wide and sincere smile. Why not? You are about to make their lives much better.
What would your body look like? If you’re thinking six-pack abs, hard ass, bulging biceps and chiseled jaw, those are nice but not necessary. If you want to make working out at the local gym a high priority, then go right ahead. Just don’t fall back on the idea that if you pump enough iron, you will get the girls. A muscular body is a luxury only. A muscular attitude will make a far bigger difference. Look as healthy as you can and if there is room for improvement; put it on a list of things to take care of as soon as you can.
What would you wear? Would the world’s most talented lover wear old holey jeans with an untucked t-shirt and a baseball cap on backwards? Not damn likely. Maybe he would wear a suit and tie, but he might well also wear some corduroys or designer jeans tailored to fit him and simple polo shirt or button down. He would have the balls to wear something just a little exotic, a little extravagant to make himself noteworthy. It might be a jaunty hat, a unique earring or a fancy belt buckle. It goes without saying that his belt and shoes would match. He would probably have a fashion consultant to tell him what he looks best in and he commonly pages through magazines like Gentleman’s Quarterly and Esquire.
What else would a man like this wear? Remember—this is a man who has slept with some of the world’s most beautiful women. He knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that women notice a myriad of small details that men would never see if neon arrows were pointing at them. If he had acne, he would have gone to a dermatologist and had it taken care of. He might even have had laser treatments to take care of decade old acne scars. He would have had his teeth whitened—not with cheap at home treatments but at a dentist’s office.
And then there is the hair. Hair is both a blessing and a curse. Have too much in some places and it has to be removed. If you don’t have enough in others, it needs to be replaced. If the hair is in your nose or ears, cut it off. If your eyebrows merge as one, start plucking. If it’s on your back or shoulders, shave it off. If it’s not on your head, either get more or shave it off. Get it styled—the long ponytail look may look good on cologne commercials but not so hot in person. Few men can pull off ponytails. If the hair is on your lip, cheeks and chin, then get it clean, soft and trimmed.
If you wear glasses, make sure the frames look good on you. Some guys look good in glasses but some do not, so be willing to give contacts a try. Keep your lips soft (who the hell wants to kiss rough, chapped lips?), keep your teeth brushed and your breath fresh (carry mints at all times) and as for smells . . . while it may be true that a recent report stated that women are subconsciously turned on by the smell of a man’s sweat, most single women might wrinkle their nose in protest. Don’t chance it. Shower daily, use deodorant, and consider designer brand cologne though this is not an absolute must-have.
If all of this sounds a little overboard, we refer you back to our earlier statement: women notice details that men never, ever see. Face it, once we’ve looked close enough to determine the size of her tits, what her ass looks like and if she’s attractive, we quit looking. Women on the other hand see details.
Remember that stud we were talking about earlier? Where would he live? Would it be in a place with dirty laundry piled on the floor, dust layered on the shelves and dirty dishes piled up in the sink? It better not be. Picture it. The hottest babe you have ever been with has agreed to come home with you. You share a hot kiss in the doorway and you fumble for the light switch behind you. She opens her eyes and instead of seeing a softly lit, inviting living room, she spies your dirty underwear hanging on the back of the couch and your greasy pizza box from last week on the kitchen table. A lot of libidos—especially women’s—would fade out quickly.
Your home says something about who you are so make sure it is making the right statement. You don’t have to have a lot of money to make a place look nice. First, keep it neat. Keep laundry in hampers out of sight, keep dishes done or at least hidden inside the dish washer and take out your trash every day or so.
Keep the temperature warm enough to be comfortable naked but not so hot, she worries about sweating all over the furniture. A dimmer switch on your lights is a great idea for setting a romantic mood and candles are always a plus to have on hand. Make sure the place smells good (not like a GUY) and definitely keep the bathroom clean above all other rooms. Keep a set of extra towels, an extra robe and an extra toothbrush in it for her to use.
Make the bed each morning—women don’t want to be seduced on what looks like a bed that has already been used and abused. Music always adds a good touch but pounding rap, harsh heavy metal or inspirational gospel are not the best choices. Stick with light jazz, instrumentals or even some blues. Keep it soft enough you can talk but loud enough you can hear.
It should go without saying, but we are going to anyway—get rid of anything in your home that remind you of or indicates the past presence of a former girlfriend. You don’t want emotional ties to negative emotions in your home. Also get rid of anything that is not quite as mature as the image you are trying to convey, i.e. those Transformers you kept, the Sponge Bob Square Pants underwear or Star Trek coffee mugs.
Have modern, comfortable furnishings in your home. Consider having conversation pieces like interesting artwork or a piece of furniture, an art easel or guitar. These are items that communicate things about you. They also act to catch a woman’s interest, spark a conversation, so she will stay longer and feel more comfortable in your home.
What should you have in your refrigerator? Champagne is always a wise choice. Wines work too. Add chocolate or strawberries and you have a guaranteed winning combination. Unplug your phone and turn off your cell phone—being in the throes of passion only to hear another girlfriend leaving a message on your machine has to be the world’s worst aphrodisiac.
Do we need to add that you should have condoms ready in the night table drawer? Do we really, really have to say that? Be grown up. Be responsible. Have sex—but keep it safe. |
| Top |
| |
| Getting Started |
In the next chapter, we will look at all of the different approaches you can take when starting the game. You will quickly notice that none of them include the friendly guy, the sweet, sensitive guy who wants to be a girl’s buddy. Why isn’t he on the list? Because, although women may love this unmasculine type for hanging out and chatting, when it comes to having sex, she wants a man who takes the lead. In this case, the nice guy not only finishes last but comes last too—and most likely alone.
Say your motto to yourself. Adopt the right attitude. Become that man you always wanted to be. Approach the most beautiful woman in the place (she is often the one that intimidates the majority of men) with a warm smile on your face. Remember everything you’ve learned. Begin talking (and never, ever, ever start with “Can I buy you a drink?”). Will you get rejected? It’s entirely possible. Remember, that women are protecting themselves. Don’t blame them for that; work around it. If you feel scared, congratulate yourself. That means you are stretching beyond your comfort zone and trying something different. That does not always feel safe. Remember though, that fear is only an emotional response to an imagined outcome. Think about that. You are scared of something that you do not even know is going to happen. Even if it does, it is not likely to be as bad as you imagined. Use the fear as energy to keep going.
So, how do you know whether a woman is interested? Well, they should all be interested in you. But if you want some obvious signs to get you warmed up, check below.
Indications that a woman is INTERESTED:
- Looks at you from the corner of her eye
- Repeatedly glances at you
- Sits up straighter, thrusting out her boobs
- Touches her hair or clothing
- Tips her head
- Moves her body towards you
- Smiles and giggles
- Licks her lips
- Compliments you
- Touches you
- Initiates conversation
- Introduces you to her friends
- You find her coincidentally around you
Indications that a Woman is NOT INTERESTED:
- Points out her wedding ring
- Says she has a boyfriend
- Leans away from you
- Surrounds herself with her friends
- Sits in a hard to reach spot
- Acts like a bitch
- No sense of humor
- Acts defensive
- Avoids eye contact
- Uses negative body language
- Appears completely disinterested
If you get rejected, be happy. Yeah, you read that right. If you get rejected, two things have happened. You learned something (next time, I will do this differently...) and you are one step closer to the woman who will say yes to you. Remember, it’s a volume game. Here are some of the most important rules to remember about being rejected:
- DO NOT take it personally.
- DO NOT give up.
(Persistence is essential.)
- DO learn from the experience.
- DO remember this is a game.
You know what the game is—and you remember that it is a game. You know a little more about how women work (trying to find out much more will only cause mental confusion and chronic frustration). You know the elements of the game that need to happen on the inside and the outside. Now let’s explore how you need to prepare yourself so that you can be ready for the bell to ring and the game to begin. The approach is ahead and your goal—no, NOT getting laid (that can happen but slow down a minute!) is to establish a connection and then if necessary, contact details whether it be a phone number, an email address or another time to meet. Any one of these can lead you from an empty, boring evening on the couch to a hot, passionate one in your bed.
What do you do from here? How do you take a number or address and turn it into the things you have only fantasized about up to this point?
That’s what the rest of this website—your key to sexual success—is here to tell you. |
| Top |
| |
|
|
